In the face of adversity – Look for your silver linings

​In the most uncertain times our current generation have ever encountered it is so very easy to become consumed by the anxiety and challenges that we are facing. However, as a nation I truly believe that we have an opportunity to take this situation and learn from it, grow and change for the better as individuals and as a community.
The way we think about our experiences influences how we feel about them and then how we react to them. Paying attention to our thoughts and how they make us feel can really make a difference to how we manage challenging and distressing situations. 

Thoughts are often automatic but how we respond to them is very much in our control. ​In the current climate it is understandable if you are having negative or irrational thoughts and feel a loss of control. This can often then lead to feelings of fear and panic, amongst many other emotions. This is no more evident than in the stock piling behaviour that has occurred in recent weeks, which I believe has been largely fuelled by a fear of not having the necessities and potentially not being able to go out to get them.
If we all take the time to notice our negative thoughts more then we can challenge them with more rational and helpful ones which will have a positive impact on how we feel and our perceived ability to cope. This is a great thing to do irrespective of the situation we find ourselves in right now. If we can come out of the other side of this pandemic with a new way of being that benefits us, our communities and the planet then there will be a purpose to our days that will help us to get through this difficult time. 
It’s important to say that by no means am I discounting the distress and negative impact that this situation is having. It is essential to allow yourself to feel all of your emotions but to do this in a balanced way so that the more distressing emotions don’t overwhelm you.

Through my interactions with others over the last few weeks and the stories I have read, I’ve been really struck by how positive some people have been despite the worry that they also have. Most people have been able to find something constructive in this situation and it has really inspired me to look for my own ‘silver linings’ (to the Covid-19 cloud). Here is a list of all those possible silver linings.
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‘Silver linings’

• Renewed appreciation – The current situation allows us to appreciate the things we typically take for granted (and I don’t just mean toilet roll)!
• New ways of working – As the nation stays at home but continues to need to provide for their families, people are having to adapt their ways of working. This has meant that people are working in ways they may never have considered or believed they could do previously. I myself have moved to online counselling, something I never offered prior to this, but would definitely consider continuing to do once ‘normality’ returns
• Learning a new skill – Being at home more gives you extra time to learn something that maybe you’ve wanted to do for a while but work and other responsibilities have taken priority. Or perhaps more time to put in to a hobby that you enjoy or trying new hobbies such as colouring, meditation, cooking or something crafty.
• Getting jobs done – We all have a mental list of jobs that we feel we should get around to doing but put off in favour of other things or a lack of time. This is a great opportunity to tick some things off that list. I am aware of lots of people who are decorating, painting fences and fixing things with the extra time they have on their hands. This can be great for clearing some mental space as well.
• Helping the planet to heal –  I have been in awe of some of the stories I’ve read about the changes we are seeing in the world since this pandemic has led us to be inside more. For example, pollution is down meaning air quality is significantly improved in large parts of the world and the canals in Venice are the cleanest they have been in decades. There are also stories of wild animals roaming the streets, from goats in Wales to pumas in Chile and boars in Spain.
• Spending more time with family –  This is an opportunity to spend more quality time with your family, playing board games, watching movies, just being with each other more. It can be challenging but rewarding if you choose to view it more positively.
• Going for walks/ bike rides – As time away from the home isn’t as accessible people are taking their chance to go out for their daily exercise by going for walks or bike rides when typically they may not have considered it before.
• Noticing new things about your local area – Following on from above, I am definitely one of those people going for walks more and I’ve been surprised to find places I wasn’t aware of in my local area. Just recently I took a walk and discovered a rope swing in a tree where I sat for a while listening to the birds and I even spotted a fox.
• A slower pace of living – Modern life is so busy for many of us that the lockdown has created an opportunity for us to slow down and take a breather from the rush of the typical every day.
• Stronger connections – Despite the physical distance from people at the moment this is an opportunity for us to become more connected as a community in our battle against this virus. People are finding different ways to stay connected to friends and family and possibly speaking more often than they would have normally.
• Learning more about yourself and what is important to you – When our everyday life is disrupted so significantly it can really highlight the things that we value most. It can also enlighten us to things we didn’t know about ourselves before such as our ability or difficulty in coping with uncertainty or change. This then creates opportunities for personal growth.
• More resourceful and less wasteful – When access to the things we often take for granted is limited, it encourages us to be less wasteful of them (again I’m not just referring to toilet roll)! In addition, we also have an opportunity to become more resourceful and think outside the box. For instance, if we are cooking and realise we need an ingredient, typically most of us may nip to the shop for it but in the current situation this may not be considered essential. We then have the chance to think more resourcefully and use something we already have available. 
• Strength in adversity – As a counsellor I meet a lot of people who struggle with anxiety and initially doubted their ability to cope with the situation as the severity of it began to become clearer. However, what those very same people are telling me now is that they are surprised by how well they have coped. They have been able to utilise previously developed coping strategies and share these with friends and family.  

​So despite the uncertainty, the change and the devastating losses that this virus has caused there are some positives that can be taken from it. Some days these will be harder to find than others and that is completely understandable. I’d urge you to be kind to yourself, take the time you need to process your unique experience of this situation and seek support and connection with those you trust and feel close to. 

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