Surviving Christmas Day - 12 helpful tips

It’s that time of year again where you can’t go in to a shop without hearing Mariah Carey belting out what she wants for Christmas or Cliff Richard telling us it’s the time for rejoicing. For some, this time of year is magical, filled with happy memories of childhood and of new memory making with family and friends. For many though this time of year is filled with loneliness, dread and sadness.
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The media and retail companies promote Christmas as a wonderful holiday with adverts depicting happy families gathered around the dinner table or the tree opening endless amounts of presents. However, the reality of Christmas can be very different for some.

Families can often be fraught with underlying issues and dysfunctional dynamics that don’t make for the wonderful image we often see on the John Lewis or Marks and Spencer’s adverts. Christmas can also be a stark reminder that loved ones are no longer here, when there is one less place at the dinner table. It can be a time where we realise how few meaningful connections we have in our lives when we’re left wondering where we can spend Christmas day and parents often feel the pressure to buy their children the latest toy when they just don’t have the finances to do so.

So if any of these resonate for you here are some tips that might help you to make it through the day.

12 tips for surviving Christmas day

1. If you will be alone this Christmas why not volunteer at a local charity that is serving Christmas dinner. Not only will it mean you are with others but you will be helping people as well.
2. Do things that bring you comfort especially if you will be alone. Put on your favourite music, have a bath, eat some nice food, watch your favourite film. Sitting around focusing on your unhappiness is likely to worsen how you feel. The act of doing something nice for yourself can help to lift your spirits even just a little.
3. If you have recently lost a loved one it can be helpful to include them in the day in some way that feels appropriate to you. Whether that is having their picture at the dinner table, visiting their resting place, playing their favourite song or buying their favourite dessert for example.
4. If the loss of a loved one means that an old tradition just doesn’t feel right to do anymore, start a new one. There are no hard and fast rules about what Christmas day should be or include, you can change the goal posts if it helps you to cope with the day.
5. If Christmas makes you feel lonely, avoid scrolling through social media on the day. People often only portray the positives of their lives on social media sites. Images of people enjoying Christmas surrounded by others will only serve to compound your sense of loneliness. What you see isn’t always the actual reality so if you do have a look, try to remind yourself of this.
6. Go out for a walk, fresh air and nature are great ways to ground yourself if things are all getting a bit too much or you need some time to mentally prepare before the world and his wife descend on your home! If there’s no time for a walk stand in the garden for 10 minutes with a warm drink.
7. Tensions often run high on Christmas day when family who typically avoid each other for the majority of the year are brought together in a confined space and expected to enjoy themselves. If this is the case, pick your battles wisely and let some of the smaller stuff go. It’s unlikely any longstanding issues will be resolved in one day so challenging them sometimes just adds fuel to the fire. Walk away knowing you are not necessarily agreeing with what is said but you’re making the choice to be the bigger person.
8. Learning to delegate on Christmas day can help to reduce the stress levels however, it can also elevate them if you like things done a certain way. Make a ‘keep out’ or ‘help not needed’ sign for the kitchen door, if the sign is on the door no one comes in!
9. If you are tasked with cooking on the big day remember being in the kitchen is the perfect time to put some headphones on and block out the chaos for a while. Put your favourite album on and have a little boogie while basting the turkey.
10. If being around a lot of people all day takes its toll on you, have regular breaks from everyone. It’s okay to hide in the bathroom for a while if you need to.
11. Remember your children will still love you if you weren’t able to buy them every single thing on their wish list. Teaching them the value in what they do have is such an important lesson.
12. Finally, remember this is your Christmas too, it’s not about pleasing everybody all of the time, you deserve to enjoy it as well.

 
If it feels like it will be impossible to enjoy the day, remember it is only one day and you can get through it.

For anyone who feels in crisis on Christmas day here are some helpful numbers you can contact for support and a listening ear.

Samaritans          116 123
Saneline               0300 304 7000
NHS                       111